When I Was This Little Girl

You have searched me, LORD, and you know me.  Psalm 139:1

When I was this little girl, little did I know!

Little did I know how it would feel to have a broken heart; how it would feel to have a friend betray me; or how it would feel not to find my prince charming the first time I thought I was in love!  When I was this little girl, there was a sweet innocence in not knowing what I would face in the years to come.

When I was this little girl, I could not have  imagined the hurts and disappointments I would experience in this journey called life.  I could not have known of the brokenness I would experience, when I was touched inappropriately.  I could not have known that because I would need to wear glasses that some  would make fun of me and diminish my self-esteem.   When I was this little girl,  I could not have known that one of my closest friends would believe a lie told by her boyfriend.  How could I know this would end our relationship for good even when she realized she had been lied to?  How could I have known of the verbal and mental abuse I would endure in my first marriage?

When I was this little girl, how could I have known that the man my mother said was my father, would never return to see me?  How could I have known  my mother would deliberately try to keep me from knowing anything about this man?  How could I know she would pass away when I was 49 years old and take all she knew about him to her grave?

When I was this little girl, my grandmother told me about a man named Jesus! My  grandmother taught me to pray at an early age.  When I would get ready for bed each night, she would have me repeat the words to the Lord’s prayer after she said each line.  I had so much love and respect for my grandmother, that I did not even question the existence of  Jesus.  I believed because my grandmother believed.

Now that I am no longer this little girl, I have come to know Jesus on my own. I appreciate what my grandmother shared with me, but I had to get to know Him for myself.  I had to experience some brokenness so that I would talk to Him every day.  I had to go through this journey called life, so that I would know to give Him praise even before I got my breakthrough.  I know He has been my protector.  I know He has heard me crying and wiped away all of my tears.  I  know my strength comes from Him.


The LORD’S Prayer

My Father, who art in heaven, I honor your name! Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven! Give me this day my daily bread.  And forgive me my debts, as I forgive my debtors.  Please lead me not into temptation, but deliver me from evil.  For thine is the kingdom, and the power and the glory, for ever. Amen! (Matthew 6:9-13)

When I was this little girl, He knew I would be broken only to 2B restored! He is my Father and He calls me daughter.

3 thoughts on “When I Was This Little Girl

  1. Jackie,

    What a wonderful testimony, thank you for sharing and showing so many of us that no matter what we have gone through, we can be restored with God’s love.

    You are a warrior in God’s army, you heard the call and through your faithfulness you answered the call to help so many of us who are broken.

    Most importantly, you showed we can be restored by accepting Jesus as our Lord and savior and having a personal relationship with Him.

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